Naruto's Tall Tales!
by XxKonoha-DemonxX
Summary: Basically, Sasuke's life is never NOT interesting. With Naruto spinning crazy stories like bull fighting and going cow tipping, it's just the beginning! Has a little SasuSaku but most of it is fluff!
1. Cow Tipping

Cow Tipping

His steel toed boots clacked against the tiles of the school hallway as Sasuke Uchiha walked to the school parking lot where his truck sat waiting. He just wanted to get out of there before his crazy best friend found him. _'C'mon, you're almost there. Just another few feet!'_ Taking his keys out, he pushed the unlock button and the car beeped, signaling it was unlocked. He heard a giggle nearby and he turned to see his girlfriend coming towards him with one of her friends.

"Hey, big boy!" Sakura Haruno called to him. Her shoulder-blade length hair swayed with her hips, but despite her luscious curves that sent him spiraling, Sakura was a complete tomboy. She wore his cowboy hat to shield herself from the intense heat of Konoha, completely ignoring the talking cheerleader at her side. "Can you believe how **_hot_** it is?"

"Yeah, it's insane," Sasuke said nervously, looking around nervously as well. Sakura caught this and cocked her head to the side.

"Are you okay, Sasuke? You look, I don't know, nervous. Not like you at all."

"I'm sorry, Sakura, but I have to go. _He's_ looking for me." Sakura's mouth opened in an "o" shape and nodded in understanding, winking slyly.

"If I see him I'll cover you, 'kay?" she told him. Sasuke smiled gratefully at her and leaned forward to kiss her in thanks. "Be careful, okay? You never know what he'll do when he finds you with him and his crazy schemes. We've known him since kindergarten and he _still _does stupid things."

"Yeah, and he tries to pull me into his pranks, too. Well, I'll see ya later, Sakura," Sasuke said, kissing her on the top of her head lovingly.

"Remember to come by my house for dinner tomorrow! My parents would love to have you over!"

"Will do!" Sasuke shouted back to her as he headed for his truck. He opened his door and hopped in, sighing in relief when he found he wasn't caught by his friend. It was after a few minutes on the road did he realize he wasn't the only one in his car.

"YO, SASUKE!" a voice shouted from his back seat. Sasuke yelled out in surprise and swerved dangerously on the road. Pulling over, he unbuckled his seat belt and began throttling his best friend, Naruto Uzumaki, within an inch of his life.

"What the hell is your fuckin' problem, you idiot?" Sasuke shouted. Naruto was cackling insanely as Sasuke shook him by his collar. "You could have killed both of us!"

"That's what you get for avoiding me, Sasuke~!" Naruto sang. After Sasuke had his fill of killing Naruto, he sat back in the driver's seat while Naruto climbed into the passenger's seat. "So, what are we doing today?"

"What are you talking about?" Sasuke blanched. "I have to go over to Sakura's house for dinner tomorrow and I have to be well rested!"

"Aw, I was hoping we could do something tonight that was fu~n!" Naruto pouted. Sasuke groaned and put his seat belt on, proceeding to pull back onto the road.

"Well, I'm not going anywhere tonight, Naruto."

"But it's a Friday! C'mon, Sasuke!"

"No!"

"Baby." That made Sasuke jerk to a halt again, but this time it was in a gas station. He turned his head to look at Naruto, who was looking at him with a cat-like expression, with a growl.

"I am **not** a baby," Sasuke warned. Naruto then began making chicken noise, resulting in Sasuke tightening his hands on the steering wheel. No one makes chicken noises at Sasuke Uchiha and gets away with it. But Naruto wasn't done.

"And I thought an _Uchiha_ like you could do something as simple as the task I'm asking you to do. Pfft, you sure proved _me_ wrong."

"Fine," Sasuke growled. "I'll do it." Then, he felt his ego swell and he smirked at his best friend. "You're talking to _Sasuke Uchiha_, Naruto. I can do **_anything_**."

"Great!" Naruto exclaimed. "Meet me near 'The Tree' at ten!" With that, the blond jumped out of the truck and proceeded through the woods to his neighborhood on the other side. Sasuke shook his head in disbelief and put his truck in drive to head home, dreading the night ahead.

* * *

Sasuke stood at the great oak tree by Sakura's house, a big empty field behind him. Glancing at his watch, he huffed in annoyance and hung on one of the giant branches of "The Tree," a huge oak tree he, Sakura, and Naruto had played on as kids. It held a lot of memories of the trio: Sakura's first broken arm at age six, Sasuke's first busted nose at age eight, and the time the two of them had pushed Naruto off the top branch for catching them making out, which was only the previous month. Looking back, Sasuke could only laugh at the memory.

"Yo, Sasuke!" The teen looked down the road to see Naruto running towards him.

"Naruto! Where have you-!"

"Shush! You don't want us to get caught, do you?" Naruto whispered. Sasuke's eyes widened, and they narrowed in a glare.

"Naruto, are we doing something illegal?" Naruto shuffled his feet in the dirt and grinned sheepishly at Sasuke. "Well?"

"Not…exactly. At least I don't think so anyway, hehe," Naruto said rubbing the back of his head.

"Dammit, Naruto! How many times do I have to tell you I'm not doing anything with you that involves the cops?"

"That's if they catch us! Please, Sasuke? I promise I won't ask anything of you anymore!" Sasuke considered this; _'Well, I could use a break from his stupid ideas…_' Sasuke nodded and shrugged.

"All right, Naruto. But this is the **last** time I will _EVER_ do anything with you, no matter how much you beg. Do you understand AND promise?" Naruto made a motion where he crossed his hands over his heart. Smiling, the blond slapped a hand on Sasuke shoulder and began pushing Sasuke closer to the field behind them.

"Have I ever told you how much I love _cows_?"

* * *

"_Cow tipping?_" Sasuke questioned. "You want to do _cow tipping_? Out of all the illegal things you could have picked, it had to be _cow tipping_?"

"Yep! Cow tipping is fun!" Naruto swept his hand across the field they were standing in. Cow of every size and color littered the vast field; white cows, black and white cows, and even brown cows. "Look! They even have brown cows! I wonder if they make chocolate milk." Sasuke face palmed as he stared at his blond friend.

"Naruto, this is pointless and stupid to even think of doing. Do you know what Sakura's parents will do to me if they ever find out what we're about to do?"

"Ah, they'll be fine!" Naruto whispered if that was even possible. At the moment, they stood in front of a cow, the hairy animal not noticing them, which was a rare thing. Sasuke knew a thing or two about cows, and one of them was that they were very alert to their surroundings. It was amazing the two of them had been able to get through the field without waking up any of the cows, as if God was saying it was all right for them to be doing this.

"Naruto, this is so stupid and, like I said, pointless. It's a wonder how the cows haven't noticed we're here!"

"Ah, shut up, scaredy cat," Naruto teased.

"I've changed my mind," Sasuke said firmly. "I'm not doing it."

"Baby." That name had him irked again and he glared at him.

"I am NOT a baby," he growled. Naruto began making the chicken noises for the second time that day, this time flapping his arms and stomping the ground to prove his point. Finally, Sasuke flung his arms in the air, groaning in defeat. "Fine, I'll do it!"

"Great! So, here's what you do: You just go up to one of them and get close to their ear and whistle. Watch this." Naruto crept up to the black and white cow in front of them on tip toes, cackling silently. Sasuke rolled his eyes and crossed his arms in annoyance. Naruto got within a few inches if the cow's ear before whistling shrilly, causing the cow to jerk away. It mooed and ran around in circles before falling over and, unbelieving to Sasuke, farted. Naruto started laughing and held onto Sasuke for support.

"I swear, cows are so dumb! Aw man, it doesn't get any better than this, bud," the blond gasped out. Sasuke rolled his eyes again and patted Naruto's shoulder as they started walking again.

"Yep, you're living the dream, buddy boy," Sasuke said to him. He turned to him, only to see Naruto wasn't there anymore. Instead, he was creeping up on another cow and giving it a shrill whistle to its ear again. The cow mooed and repeated the same actions as the first, finally flipping on its side and farting. As it did these movements, Naruto danced over to Sasuke, his jumps and movements times with the cows, and jabbed him in the shoulder when the cow farted. Naruto started laughing again and pointed at Sasuke.

"I don't care who you are, that's funny right there," Naruto whispered/laughed. "Alright, your turn now!"

"Naruto, I can't. I don't even know how to whistle," he lied.

"You say you don't know how, or you're just too chicken, like that hair of yours!" Naruto said pointing at Sasuke's abnormal shaped hair. Sasuke fumed and flicked him off, running his other hand through his hair. "HA! You ARE chicken!" He started making the chicken sounds once again until Sasuke snapped.

"Fine!" Sasuke strode over to a large cow that slept soundly, unaware of the treat that stood in front of it. Sasuke looked at Naruto, unsure if he should really be doing this to _Sakura's parents'_ cows. Naruto made a sweeping gesture as if inviting him to do his task. The teen in front of the cow huffed and stepped forward a step. Placing his fingers in his mouth, he blew hard, producing a whistle so loud not only did it wake up the cow in front of him, but the whole field.

Cows around them woke up with jerks and mooed, performing the same way the first two cows had: mooing, spinning around, flopping on their sides, and finally, with a few second pause, farted in almost perfect unison. It was completely silent for a second before a louder fart sounded out through the field, making Sasuke and Naruto burst out laughing. They calmed down after a few minutes, sighing at each other before another sound filled the air. It sounded like a cow, but slightly larger and threatening. Naruto's eyes went wide, causing Sasuke to look at him questioningly.

"There's Frank!" And with that, Naruto bolted.

"Naruto! Who's Frank?" Sasuke shouted. He soon found his answer when a HUGE bull came ramming through the bushes in front of him and he let out a yell before following his friend. Naruto was laughing his head off as the bull chased them around the field, Sasuke running faster to get away from it while catching up with Naruto.

"He's going to get you, Sasuke!" Naruto laughed. Sasuke realized Frank was getting closer to them, his horns lowering dangerously to their legs. Then, they were soaring over the fence, separating them from Frank, who roared in anger. Sasuke put on one last burst of speed as they ran away, Naruto cackling the whole way.

* * *

"And so, when that ditzy cheerleader _finally_ realized that I had smeared red paint all down her front, I was already bolting from the art room!" Sakura laughed. Sasuke yawned and leaned his elbow on the table tiredly. He was at Sakura's house for dinner the next day, Naruto sitting right next to him, laughing at Sakura's story. Her parents laughed as well as they ate their dinner and listened to her story. "Sasuke?" Sakura's voice made him jolt from his daze to look at his girlfriend.

"Yeah, Sakura?" he asked.

"Are you okay? You look really tired," she said, placing a hand on his arm. He nodded and stretched his back.

"Yes, I'm okay. I didn't much sleep last night because I was up doing some stuff."

"So, Sasuke dear," Sakura's mom started. "I hear you're quarterback this year for the football team."

"Yes ma'am. The best, according to the coaches." Sakura's father laughed and clapped a hand on his shoulder.

"Well, that's fantastic! I could give you some pointers after-!"

"Mr. Haruno!" their neighbor, a little boy, suddenly cried from their back door. "You're cows and Frank got out just now!" The older man was up in an instant and running out the door, grabbing a set of keys at the same time.

"Sasuke, Naruto, I'm going to need some help rounding them up!" he shouted back at the boys. Sakura gave Sasuke a look that immediately told him she knew it had been them. Sasuke gestured to Naruto with his head and sprang from his seat, Naruto following him. They gave each other horrified looks before running outside to help round up the cows and the bull. A few minutes passed as Sakura and her mother continued to eat dinner before they were interrupted by yells of terror from whom they knew too well: Naruto and Sasuke.

"It was them, wasn't it, Sakura?" her mother asked calmly. Sakura sighed and nodded. "Frank didn't sound too happy last night. He never liked Naruto a lot."

"No, he didn't. I wonder if getting Frank taught those two idiots a lesson," Sakura said happily.

"I'm sure it did, honey, I'm sure it did."


	2. Naruto and The Ghost Light

Naruto and The Ghost Light

An old man stood watering his plants, the old tin pail echoing with the pouring water. He watered each one, staying on one for a few moments before moving to the next one, finally getting to the last one. Suddenly, it moved away from the falling water, the plant sliding across the asphalt. The man watched it in surprise and shock as it shifted from its spot to a corner where Naruto Uzumaki stood hidden, snickering to himself as he played a prank on the old man, who stood frozen as he watched his plant move away.

* * *

Two men in the auto part shop in town were closing up for the night, talking to one another as they stalked tires and tools in the places they needed to be in. All of a sudden, the tires to the first man's side moved slightly and he looked over suspiciously, tapping his buddy on the shoulder. The guy picked up a drill and approached the tire stack carefully, pumping the drill a few times. And then, the tires blew away, Naruto jumping out of them with a yell that scared the men so badly, it made them faint.

* * *

Sakura stood in the gas station she worked in, thumbing through a magazine she had taken from the rack to solve her boredom. It had been a slow day without any customers, only the occasional, greasy truck driver looking for fatty food to fill them. One of them had actually tried to flirt with her, giving her cheesy compliments, but it was at that moment Sasuke decided to stop by to say hello. Let's just say that truck driver never had the balls to look Sakura in the eyes anymore.

Something moved out of the corner of her eye and Sakura looked out of curiosity. Suddenly, a person popped out and shouted: "I vant to suck your blood!" Sakura screamed bloody murder and Naruto started laughing, taking out the fake plastic teeth he had put in his mouth to scare her with. Sakura yelled in frustration and began to throw stuff at him.

"Get out of here, Naruto!" she screamed at him. Naruto cackled and ran out of the gas station.

* * *

An old woman sat rocking in her chair, her eyes closed showing she was asleep. Naruto snuck up next to her on tip toes, snickering to himself. When he was close to her, he jumped up and shouted: "BOO!" But she didn't wake up. Naruto frowned and started shouting random noise to scare her, but she didn't wake up, so he backed away, a little scared that she was dead. The old woman tittered and continued rocking her chair.

* * *

A hippie man walked out from his house to carry in a case of beer for his own pleasure, walking back inside to put it away. Naruto came around the corner and added another, running back around to hide. The man came back out, took a look at the extra one before a confused look came over his face as he took it and walked back inside.

A few minutes later, the man came back outside to grab the other cases before an astonished look came over his face. There sat fifteen other beer cases waiting to be taken inside. He took a few steps back before walking back into his house slowly, Naruto laughing his head off on the side of his house.

* * *

Sasuke and Sakura, as well as all their friends, sat around a camp fire they had set up to enjoy in the winter evening. All of them were enjoying, save for Naruto, because he wasn't there.

"God, it is a beautiful night," Sasuke breathed. A branch cracked behind the group and Sakura giggled while some people chuckled.

"It sure is a nice night!" Sakura drawled out, nudging Sasuke's arm. He looked down at her as she gestured to the trees behind them. Sasuke chuckled and got up from his spot.

"I hope Naruto isn't waiting around anywhere to scare me, because I'll _freak_ out-"

"BOO!" Sasuke yelled out as Naruto came up behind him and scared the crap out of him. Sasuke fell to the ground, making his cowboy hat he had _finally _gotten back from Sakura a couple days before drop to the ground beside him. Naruto was laughing as the group laughed with him, Sakura walking over to help him up.

"If only you could move that fast while chasing Daddy's cows," Sakura giggled. Sasuke huffed and dusted off his jeans, glaring at Naruto the whole time.

"Aw man, Sasuke," Naruto laughed. "You looked like you just saw _The Ghost Light_!"

"Naruto!" a voice yelled. Sasuke and Sakura looked over their shoulders while Naruto stared ahead to see their teacher, Kakashi, standing there with his hands on his hips. "**Don't** mock The Ghost Light."

"What _is_ The Ghost Light?" Sasuke asked in a monotone voice. The area suddenly went quiet and Sasuke stared at them questioningly. Everyone, including Sakura, turned to look at Kakashi, slightly afraid of what he was going to say next.

"The Ghost Light is a glowing orb of blue, translucent light that haunts these very parts."

"Ah, don't be too scared, buddy," Naruto said nudging Sasuke. "It isn't real-"

"IT IS REAL!" Kakashi suddenly shouted. The air suddenly got colder as the two boys jerked to look at their teacher. "It all started on a night like tonight, the coyotes howling at the moon above while the wind blew cold gusts over the plateaus." Sasuke looked at Naruto, who raised his eyebrows in amusement. "A couple as young as you all was driving down this very strip of country when they saw a mysterious, blue glow." Sakura hung onto Sasuke's sleeve in fright while he put an arm around her shoulders.

"And all that was left of them after their encounter with the blue light were their car's cylinders. So remember! The one thing that angers The Ghost Light the most is the sound of jingling keys." The sound of keys shaking reached Sasuke's ears and he turned to stare at Naruto, who's keys were shaking because he was too. "As you go to sleep tonight in each other's company, remember to keep an ear out, because The Ghost Light could be _anywhere_…" There was a dramatic pause as Kakashi stared at them all with the eye that wasn't covered by the bandana. Then: "Well, goodnight!" And the teacher dove into his tent in a hurry.

"Oh, well I'm bushed!" Shikamaru Nara, one of their friends, cried out, and he too dove into his tent, his girlfriend, Ino Yamanaka, following close.

"Goodnight!" she shouted.

"Goodnight! See you in the morning!" Sakura exclaimed, grabbing Sasuke hand. He waved to Naruto who just stood there, a horrified look on his face. Once their tent was zipped up, Naruto finally squeaked out a "Goodnight…" He started walking to his tent a little ways away from their camp sight, now wishing he had put it closer but he wasn't allowed to since he snored so loud. Whistling weakly, he stuffed his hands in his pockets nervously, almost sighing in relief when he saw his tent. Suddenly, a coyote in the distance howled and he yelled out in fear, diving in his tent. With fumbling hands, he tried to close it, but it was a futile effort because it was stuck in place.

Naruto whimpered when he felt like he had to pee, and that meant he had to get out of his tent and go somewhere to go pee. Stumbling from his tent, he walked over to the bushes where he relieved himself. He sighed in relief and zipped up his pants quickly before turning around, but he saw a small light coming towards him.

"Shit! It's The Ghost Light!" he exclaimed stumbling back. "No! Spare me, oh Ghost Light!" Naruto suddenly tripped on something behind him and he fell to the ground, putting his hands over his face to shield himself. But nothing happened. He peeked from under his hand to see a firefly floating near him, its light going on and off. "Oh, it's just a firefly. Plus, Kakashi said it was blue," Naruto reassured himself. And then, something bright and iblue/i turned on behind him and he froze completely, terror seizing him quickly. Turning around with jerky motions, his eyes widened when he saw _The Ghost Light_ floating right behind him.

Naruto gave out a yell so loud that birds flew from the trees above him. He got up quickly and made a dash for anywhere safe, not seeing Sasuke and Shikamaru come out of the bushes, giving each other a high five.

"The Ghost Light is going to get me!" Naruto shouted. He ran blindly past Sakura and Ino, who were watching him in chairs, giggling at him. He didn't even notice Kakashi, who walked right by him with a grin under his mask. Sasuke and Shikamaru walked up to Sakura and Ino and watched as Naruto tried to run away from "The Ghost Light," or the glow stick they had strapped to the back of his shirt.

* * *

After about ten minutes of running, Naruto finally stopped and fell to the ground exhausted. Looking out the corner of his eye, he saw the glow stick on his shirt and reached behind him to take it off. He sat with his legs under him, staring at the glow stock in wonder before realization hit him.

"Hey! Wait a minute!" Laughter behind him made him look to find Sasuke, Sakura, Ino, Shikamaru, and Kakashi walking towards him.

"Took you long enough to notice, you big idiot!" Sakura said. Naruto scowled and took the arm she offered to him.

"I knew it was joke the entire time," he said dusting his pants off. "But that still wasn't nice, guys."

"And so isn't torturing the poor town folk, Naruto," Ino sighed. Naruto grinned sheepishly while rubbing the back of his head.

"Hehe, yeah…" Sasuke chuckled and patted his shoulder comfortingly.

"You see, Naruto, the only thing to be scared about out here is your stupid imagination," Kakashi sighed. Shikamaru laughed while putting his hands behind his head.

"That, and The Screaming Banshee," the lazy southerner drawled. They all looked at him for a few minutes before laughing.

"Yep! So you better watch out, Naruto!" Sakura teased.

"Shut up, Sakura," Naruto pouted while crossing his arms. Sakura shrugged and took Sasuke's hand.

"Well, goodnight, everyone!" she yelled before leading him off. Ino did the same with a smirking Shikamaru and it was just Kakashi and Naruto. His teacher turned to him and patted him on the back.

"Shikamaru was right, Naruto. You better watch your back tonight. I hear the banshee preys on teenagers like yourself." Naruto laughed nervously as Kakashi walked off into the night to his tent. Looking around, he scuffed his sneakers on the ground and looked down, suddenly hearing loud, rough breathing behind him. Turning to look behind him, he saw a large monster with dripping canines and bloodshot eyes eyeing him menacingly. Naruto blinked at it before saying:

"You better get out of here. They say there's a, uh, screaming banshee out here that likes to eat travelers, including teenagers." With that, he walked off, leaving a VERY confused banshee in his place.


	3. El Narutastico!

**_Just another story created from Mater's Tall Tales! This is the one where he's the famous El Materdor! Hope you like it! Oh and the italics are him telling the story but it's in that time period. It's not really a flashback it's just giving a description of what he's telling them lol.  
_**  
**_Disclaimer: Kishimoto found out about the crazy and wild party I threw for the rest of Team 7...let's just say it did NOT end well._**

* * *

**El Narutastico!**

The tractor in the cow pasture rolled by the fence Sasuke and Sakura were standing against. Sakura waved to her father as he herded the cows and bull Frank to be fed, and for the cows to be milked. Sasuke put a hand around her waist and she leaned her head on his shoulder, a content smile on her face. Summer had just started and it was already ninety degrees outside every day, from ten in the morning to five in the evening. Their days were filled with going to the beach and the pool, and in Sasuke and Naruto's case helping Sakura's father out in case he needed their assistance.

Sasuke looked over the field where he saw Frank the bull being herded to the barn that stood near the house. As if sensing his presence, Frank turned his big head towards Sasuke and snorted, his eyes threatening him as he practically glared at him. The boy flinched back unintentionally, remembering the night he and Naruto had gone cow tipping.

Cocking his eyebrow in confusion, Sasuke looked around the field and area they were in. The blond was nowhere to be found. _'No doubt helping Ms. Haruno cook for the evening,'_ he thought with a snort. Still, he couldn't help but wonder where Naruto really was. _'Where_ _is that idiotic knuckle head-?'_

"You know, I used to be a famous bull fighter!"

Sasuke cried out in surprise as Sakura yelped. Naruto stood there with a big grin on his face, a sombrero-looking cowboy hat on his head.

"Naruto," Sakura started, her eyes wide. "Where did you get that-"

"Bull fighter?" interrupted Sasuke.

"To answer your obvious questions, I got my hat in Mexico during my adventures with Jiraiya and it was during my adventures that I became known as El Narutastico!" Naruto struck a pose and grinned again. Sasuke and Sakura exchanged a look; Naruto had indeed gone on a trip with his god father, Jiraiya, but all the stories Naruto came up with full of lies and they knew that. This latest one was probably going to be even more ludicrous sounding then the last.

"_You _were a famous bull fighter?" Sasuke questioned.

"Sure was! I was the most famous bull fighter in all of Spain!" exclaimed Naruto. He jumped up on the fence and crouched down in front of them. "Jiraiya had accidentally seen one of the daughters of the bull fight owner and _apparently _it was a big deal." Sasuke snorted and shot him a look that all but said _No duh, retard_. "So, Jiraiya put me in as a representative for the bull fights and I was a huge hit! We got paid and everything, and all of Spain came and watched the famous El Narutastico perform his last bull fight!"

* * *

_The crowd cheered as El Narutastico stepped out into the sandy terrain, his bull fighting costume on and his red cloth in his hands. Spanish music played loudly over the speakers but the crowd screamed louder as Naruto stood in the center of the arena. A smirk played on his lips as he bowed to them, stopping at the owner of the bull fights to show his gratitude. Jiraiya sat next to him, girls all around him as he giggled pervertedly and drank more beer that was provided. _

"_El Narutastico!" the younger ladies squealed. _

_Naruto grinned up at the ladies and winked, and one of them fanned herself. _

_Snapping his red cloth and placing it at his hip, he turned towards the door where the bull he would be facing would come out of._

* * *

"And so, when the bull came out with his eyes glaring, I looked it straight in the eye and pulled out my red cloth for it to see!" Naruto made a grand gesture and Sakura's eyes widened in amusement. Sasuke rolled his eyes and leaned an elbow on the fence.

* * *

_The bull, seeing the red of Naruto's cloth, seethed in anger and roared in fury. Naruto grinned as it came charging at him and right when it was almost touching him, he pulled the cloth out of the way. _

"_Ole," he said simply. _

"_OLE!" screamed the crowd back. The bull turned back around and charged again, growing more and more speed. But, Naruto pulled the cloth out of the way again with a simple flourish of his hands. _

"_Ole," Naruto called. And the crowd answered yet again with an enthusiastic "OLE!" When Naruto turned to where the bull was now, he started mocking it by making kissing noises at it. Finally angered enough, the animal rushed at him. Bellowing loudly, it was caught off guard when Naruto had him spinning in circles until it fell over, dizzy and disoriented. The crowd cheered louder than when it started, and Jiraiya leapt in the air, money he had just received as bet money flying from his hands._

_Suddenly, the bull came out of nowhere and slammed his huge body sideways into Naruto. El Narutastico went flying through the air, a cry of surprise flying from his mouth as he went head first into the ground. The arena went deathly quiet as Naruto lay there not moving, his face pressed into the dirt and red cloth draped over his body. Jiraiya had stopped jumping around and the ladies had looks of horror on their faces before starting to cry. A priest was saying a prayer over Naruto, who still hadn't moved. _

_And then, Naruto started stirring and the crowd was on its feet in a second, looks of hope on their faces. Naruto stood up shakily and shook his head to clear it. He turned around and glared up at the bull, his eyes showing hatred for it that made it glare back. _

"_He's alive!" screamed Jiraiya as he shook the bull fight owner but the collar happily._

_Naruto stepped up to the bull again, standing only a few feet away from it as they had a glaring contest. Then, slowly, Naruto raised the cloth and snapped it in front of him as an invitation._

* * *

"Now, the bull fight owner didn't like the fact that I was still alive," Naruto said, "so, he had some of his people open more doors and two more bulls rumbled out." Sakura gasped in surprise while Sasuke shook his head at his girlfriend's naivety.

* * *

_All the bulls charged Naruto at once and he had to back up in order to stay calm. When one bull got in front of the other, he took that chance to have the bull ram into the wall behind. _'One bull down,' _he thought. A second bull came at him from the side and the third came after him, too. He stood in the center of them with his red cloth out, a concentrated look on his face. Then, as they got within a few feet from him, he moved out of the way and they slammed into each other. _

_The bull that he had made ram into the wall recovered and ran after him just as Naruto stepped away from the other two, who were beginning to recover quickly. They made it to where they surrounded him on three sides, circling him._

"_How dare you do this!" Jiraiya shouted from the top. "We had a deal!"_

"_So?" sneered the owner. "Why not give the crowd a little excitement?" Jiraiya glared at him before turning to look at his god son. _'Please be careful, Naruto!'

_Naruto watched the bulls closely to see through their movements. The bulls snorted and grunted at him, almost mocking him. And then, they charged as one, all three aiming for the boy in the middle with the red cloth that had provoked them for too long. Just as they were about to reach him, Naruto jumped into the air and all three bulls rammed into each other. The people of Spain went crazy as he landed in front of them, a playful smirk on his face._

"_Ole, El Narutastico!" screamed the girls around the bull owner. Naruto bowed and caught a rose that had been thrown to him, putting it in his mouth and bowing again._

_All of a sudden, the three bulls surrounded him again, but there were four more that had joined them. A look of fear came to his face as Naruto froze where he was._

* * *

"And there I was!" Naruto shouted. "The bulls were surrounding me, waiting and watching with big, black eyes."

"Oh my gosh!" Sakura exclaimed.

"What happened?" Sasuke asked. He had become interested when Naruto had managed to outsmart the three bulls and he was leaning in with a look of interest. "What did you do?"

"Wha-Don't you remember, Teme?" Sasuke and Sakura gave him a look of confusion and Naruto just smiled. "You was there, too!"

"What?" the couple exclaimed.

"Okay, Naruto, I think you're story is getting a little out of control," Sasuke growled.

"Nuh uh!" Naruto pouted. "They sure did like that red shirt Sakura gave you for your birthday!"

"Is that what happened to that shirt?" Sakura cried.

"What? No!" Sasuke flinched when he saw the tears in Sakura's eyes.

"You told me your dog ripped it up!" Sakura stomped off towards her house, her face red with anger.

"You retard!" Sasuke turned on Naruto, who was sitting there with an innocent expression. "Your stories have to stop! They always get me in trouble somehow!"

"Well, it's not MY fault that you suck at bull fighting," huffed Naruto. He hopped down from his spot on the fence and started towards the barn.

"None of that stuff happened, Naruto!"

Then, Naruto turned to him and shrugged. "Well try telling that to those bulls over there Mr. Haruno got today. They look awfully familiar!" Sasuke turned to look at the trailer that was hitched to Sakura's father's truck, a crossed look of fear and confusion on his face. Snorts came from the trailer and red eyes glared at him before four bulls ran out towards him with a goal set in mind.

Sasuke cried out in horror and turned to run for the barn, but stumbled and scrambled back up. Sakura's father came out of the barn with Naruto behind him, a smile on his lips.

"'Atta boy, Sasuke!" he yelled. "Now bring them around to the barn!"

"Why the hell do you have bulls?" Sasuke yelled.

"BABY COWS, TEME!" Naruto yelled back, a calf squirming in his arms. Sasuke put on a burst of speed towards the barn, his burning glare on Naruto, the one who had put him in this mess in the first place. He stretched his arm out to grab the blond, but suddenly tripped and went head first into a pile of cow poop. Naruto flinched back in disgust and Mr. Haruno rushed forward to trap the bulls in the barn, latching the lock securely.

"Um, Teme?" Naruto said hesitantly. "Are you okay?"

Sasuke stood up slowly, his head lowered and poop dripped off him in big globs. It splattered to the ground and Naruto made a face before looking back at Sasuke. The calf in his arms was frozen in fear as it looked at Sasuke. It squirmed harder and Naruto dropped it as he stumbled back from Sasuke dark expression, waving his arms in front of him in surrender.

"Na-ru-to," Sasuke growled, his voice turning evil. "I will _kill_ you."

"A-Ah, just wait a minute, Sasuke," stammered Naruto, but someone caught his attention. "SAKURA! Your boyfriend is trying to kill me!" Sakura walked up with a towel in her hand and gave it to Sasuke.

"Come on, Sasuke," Sakura said with a smile. "Let's go get you cleaned up."

"B-But, Sakura-"

"_**Now**_." Just the tone of her voice made Sasuke snap up and follow her inside. Naruto watched them walk into the house, frozen because of Sakura's scary voice. Suddenly, a girly scream came from the kitchen area followed by the sound of gurgling. Sakura had Sasuke pinned down in the sink under the water, shouting things at him that couldn't be heard through the glass windows. His arms were flailing to grab support as his girlfriend tried to drown him. Mr. Haruno walked up next to Naruto, shaking his head.

"So was that story about you being a famous bull fighter true?" the older man asked.

"Shooooot yeah!" Naruto whipped off his hat and pulled a red cloth. He flapped it open and swung towards the bulls, a grin on his face.

"Ole!"

* * *

**_Lol just another short! Basically the whole Cars/Naruto theme going on here is a bunch of shorts that I got from Mater's Tall Tales! I absolutely LOVE Mater! _**


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